Title: Finding Hope 1/?
Author: Tim
Pairing: C/S
Rating: Mature (not yet though)
Spoilers: nope
Disclaimer: The characters are not mine, but if they were, I would make the
show WAY more fun.
AN: This is a personal challenge from Wend, thanks sis. 
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CHAPTER 1
Sometimes I hate the fact that I came to Vegas, but I was doing Grissom a favor
and just stuck around because he offered me his opening. I slowly became part
of the team with everyone, but Catherine. She insisted on being an uber-bitch every chance she got,
and I gave as good as she did which landed me in trouble a few times, but we
finally buried the hatchet somewhat. Although, we usually
have a monthly blow up, and it is common knowledge that there is a pool on when
during the month it will happen. So here I am sitting on the bench in
front of my locker getting my stuff together after a draining shift when my
pager went off. I let out my favorite four letter word when I saw it was from
Grissom.
I made sure I had everything before heading to see what Gil wanted, so I could
go home and sleep through my two days off. I walked into the room and found
Catherine sitting in front of Grissom's desk as he gestured me to sit. I really
wanted to flip him off, but I sat down with a loud sigh earning a chuckle out
of Catherine. I would have sniped, but I was too damn tired as Gil stood up and
shut his door before sitting back down. There is no way this is about Catherine
and I because we haven't blown up at each in a while,
so I glanced over at Catherine, and she seemed to be as interested as me.
"Let me start off by saying, I am only doing this because I have been
ordered to by the Sheriff and Ecklie. It seems a
there is an underground baby abduction/auctioning ring going on, and the powers
that be want it to stop, so they came up with the brilliant plan of setting up
an appointment with the lawyer involved, so you can make an appeal to adopt a
baby, but the catch is that the lawyer conducts a background check and makes
sure you are a real couple, so you would have to move in together as soon as
possible," he explained as all I could was sit there and stare not knowing
what to say, but Catherine did.
"Why in the hell does it have to be Sara and I?
Why can't it be me or her with one of the guys? And who brilliant idea was to
pair us together, Ecklie's?" Catherine ranted as
I was still speechless while my tired brain went through what I heard.
"Catherine, you know how much hassle same-sex couples get when they try to
adopt, so it was suggested that the two best investigators be paired up to take
these bastards down, and since this is your assignment, you won't be working
here for the duration, but you will be getting paid. UNLV has an opening for a
physics professor, so that will be Sara's cover while you Catherine are the
homemaker," I burst into a fit of laughter at that because Catherine is alot of things, but housewife is not one of them.
"Fine. Let's go sweetie, I'm tired," I said
grabbing Catherine's hand and pulling us out of Grissom's office. I took us
straight out to my car because I wanted to make sure this was okay with her,
"Catherine, I know this isn't something your pissed about, but I really
want to nail these guys. Look at it this way, we get paid to non-CSI work, and
you get to spend who knows how much time with Lindsay. The only drawback being
that you are married to a workaholic loner who barely know
how to act towards other people."
"Well maybe I can change that, honey," Catherine said making us both
laugh as I drove to my place because I knew that it would be easier to move me
in then move them into my place. The car ride was quiet which wasn't all that
surprising considering the bomb we had dropped on us. The one thing I did know
was that this place could come in handy if they ask why I have a separate
apartment. I knew some professors that kept a studio to have out of class
discussions, so that would be my reasoning. I only packed a couple suitcases
because I would have to get a slightly different wardrobe.
The ride to Catherine's was just as quiet. I wouldn't have minded talking, but
my body was working on fumes, and all I wanted to do was crash. We could
discuss everything when we were both fully awake. The only glitch I can see on
this working smoothly was Lindsay. She is a sixteen year old girl and will have
to handle this whole situation without any problems, but we get along well
enough that it shouldn't be a problem, but considering the fact that she is a
teenager, it is a crap shoot. I pulled into Catherine's driveway, and she
grabbed one of bags before leading us into the house.
It seemed nobody was home as she led me up the stairs and down the hall before
opening a door that led to a bedroom, "Sleep here for now, and we'll
decide what to do when we both aren't dragging ass," as I nodded to
Catherine's assessment to the situation. Since I was a 'guest' in Catherine's
house, I put on my sleep shirt before climbing under the covers and laying my
head on the pillow. It wasn't very long after that when I fell asleep.
You know that feeling you get when you know someone is staring at you. Well, I
woke up to that feeling. I opened my eyes to find Lindsay just watching me. I
glanced and saw the door was shut, so it was just her and I, "Um Lindsay,
is there something you needed?" I asked stretching, groaning, and popping
a la my normal wake up regiment.
"Yeah, are you going to tell Mom how you really feel about her during this
'assignment'?" she asked with air quotes and everything.
"I don't know," because I didn't. What was I going to say. Hey Catherine, I like you, and not in a friendly way.
"Give it some thought. Now come on, I need some help on my homework,
Mama," giggling as she stood up before leaving. Okay, that answers the
Lindsay question, but there was still the umpteen
Catherine ones as I crawled out of bed to get dressed to start my new life.
CHAPTER 2
Oh goddess, this screams bad idea,
but we're both in this, so at least I'm not the only one freaking out. And poor
Lindsay, she is going to have to play referee with her mom and her best adult
friend. I grabbed the pillow under my head and yelled into it before climbing
out of bed and grabbing a change of clothes heading for the bathroom. I brushed
my hair pulling back in a ponytail and took a couple deep breaths before
walking out of the bathroom and down the hall to Lindsay sitting at the dining
room table with her homework spread out. I've never been jealous of anyone, but
I do envy Catherine because of Lindsay. I would love to have a daughter like
her.
"You're eating this up aren't you?" I asked her as she nodded her
head giggling, "Yeah, yeah, yuk it up, sweetie.
Where's your mom?"
"You mean you wife," turning around and scowling at that comment,
"She went to see Uncle Gil. I'm guessing neither of you wanted to do this
assignment?"
"Linds, I probably would have been more opened
to it if it wasn't forced on us. I mean here Catherine and I are being told to
be a married couple, so we can bust up a baby ring. Ugh, enough about that
right now. Did you want a snack while we do your homework?"
She did, so I cut her up some fruit. This wasn't exactly what she wanted, but
she ate while we worked through her assignments. Lindsay is smarter than she
gives herself credit for. Maybe something good can come of this after this is
over after all. When we finished all her stuff, she headed to her room while I
went to mine and put stuff away. When that was done, I stretched out on my bed
trying to figure out how this was going to work. I would talk to Catherine
about this, but she isn't here, so I get to overthink
it myself. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up to knocking on my door.
I opened it to find a smiling Lindsay, "Mom's still at Gil's, and I'm
getting hungry, so I was hoping..." what did she think I couldn't cook. Boy, is she in for a surprise.
"I'll feed ya, but don't expect to be eating any meat," shrugging her
shoulders at this, "Okay then, lets see what I
can fix. Oh, and you are helping my dear," I said as she pouted, but I
grabbed her hand as we headed for the kitchen.
I'm such a softie. I let her sit at the kitchen island while I whipped up a frittata
before starting a pancake batter. I would have made something else, but if Linds is as hungry as I am, I wanted something quick. I
went all out with the toppings too since there was fresh fruit galore. Tonight
is Catherine's free pass because of the situation, but if this becomes a habit,
we will have a talk. I let Lindsay start on the pancakes while the frittata was
cooling. We ate at the island since it was just the two of us, and she talked
about her day at school while we ate.
While Lindsay loaded the dishwasher, I made a plate for Catherine in case she
was hungry when she came home. Afterwards, Lindsay and I headed for the family
room to watch some movies. Since it was a friday
night, I figured that Lindsay had at least a midnight bedtime being fifteen. If
I'm wrong, so be it. Knowing my taste in movies is like hers, we watched Ice
Age and Ice Age II. We stretched out on the couch covered up, and halfway
through the second one, Lindsay was asleep, and
somewhere between that and the end, I was being woken up by Catherine.
"Sara, I want to apologize for tonight. I'm sorry for leaving Lindsay with
you, but this job has my stomach in a twist, and I wanted to do some yelling,
so I went to see Grissom and gave him a piece of my mind. After that, we talked
and smoothed things out. How were things here?" she asked as I sat up.
"Not too bad, I helped Linds with her homework.
Then, I put my room in order before making dinner, and afterwards, we watched a
movie, That being said, I'm only going to say this
once. If you ever leave here by myself, we will have a
problem, but considering what happened today, I'll give you a pass. Tomorrow is
a new day, good night Catherine," I said standing up not acknowledging
Catherine as I headed to my room.
----
I woke up the next morning actually feeling relaxed, so I headed to the
bathroom for a shower. I took a quick knowing I now share hot water with two
other people. After getting changed, I headed towards the aroma of hot coffee.
What I found was Catherine sitting at the table eating breakfast, "Good
morning ladies," I announced getting groans. Nice, I live with non-morning
people. After pouring my cup of coffee, I looked over the choices of cereals
and saw somebody liked my favorite, Fruity Pebbles. I poured myself a bowl
before joining the duo at the table and ate in silence. Swell.
Lindsay took care of the dishes before putting the coffe
pot on the table before heading to our room. Oh goody, I'm about to eat some
shit as Catherine put her hand on mine, "Sara, I owe you an apology. I
admit I was a little mad after what you said last night, but when I found my
plate, and after Lindsay and I talked this morning, I am deeply sorry for
yesterday, and I know we haven't always gotten along, but maybe this is our
chance to fix that. Plus, we get to nail these scumbags in the process."
"Thank you Catherine. How about we take Linds somewhere as a family in case these guys are already
watching us," I suggested as Catherine smiled giving me a kiss on the
cheek before heading towards Lindsay's room. Okay, night one sucked, but
morning one is looking up, so who knows what is going to happen next, and as
friendly as we are know, I'm sure Catherine and I are destined to lock horns
before this is over. I just hope we can survive it, or better yet, survive the
day since the Willows women are headed my direction.
CHAPTER 3
The last couple weeks have been
great, but that was only because we were getting into our characters, so the
family stuff has been perfect. Well not exactly, but Lindsay has kept the peace
enough for Catherine and I to stay civil. My
professorship has been surprisingly fun. After this assignment, I might have to
take vacations, so I can do more teaching assignments to broaden my horizons. Although, tomorrow has the chance to change everything. We
have our meeting with our 'adoption' lawyer, and I know we need to sell our
story, so I have the perfect thing to use, but it is going to cause some
friction when we get home.
My alarm went off after a fitful night of sleep, and I headed to the bathroom
to take care of my usual morning rituals. After getting dressed, I padded
downstairs to find that I was the only one up, so I started coffee and
breakfast, guaranteed to get both 'my' girls up. I decided to go with a veggie
and cheese omelet because I wasn't in the mood to mess with making Lindsay's
favorite pancakes. Maybe if the meeting goes well, I can make them tomorrow. I
had just plated breakfast when Lindsay came down smiling. She is happy because
she doesn't have school today.
"Morning mama," Lindsay said giggling as she sat down starting to
eat. She has called me mama since I got here, but she has been using it more
around others now.
"Morning Linds, is your mom up?" asking
while giving a glass of milk.
"Yeah, she is prettying herself up for her wife," giving her a glare
at that remark as I sat down to eat waiting for Catherine to join us.
Catherine joined us halfway through breakfast, and once Lindsay finished I
motioned for her to leave, so we could gameplan, but
Catherine and I just ate in silence which let my unease about what I was going
to do to help our case deepen. I just hope Catherine can play along long enough
to get us through to the main focus of the case. Because once we were cleared
by the lawyer, there were people undercover to take the ring down once we had
'our' baby, so after we dropped Lindsay off at her grandma's, i drove us to Mr. Scott's office.
I interlocked our fingers as we walked into his office, and his secretary told
us that he would be right with us, so I stroked my thumb over Catherine's hand
while we waited. While most of me knew this was just a case, there was a small
part that was enjoying being this close to Catherine. We stood when Mr. Scott
came out of his office motioning us inside. To me, he looked alright on the
outside, but there was something in his eyes that made me cringe. I led
Catherine inside as we sat down in front of his desk.
"Hello Catherine and Sara, I'm Terrence Scott. We all know why you are
here, but the question is, why should I help
you?" he asked as I took a deep breath before kissing Catherine's hand.
"We are out of options, Mr. Scott. Adoptions agencies will only let adopt
older kids, and with Catherine's age, pregnancy is risky, and we have tried
every way possible for me to get pregnant, but nothing has worked, so we are at
our wits end. All we want is a baby," tears were flowing by the time I was
done, and it wasn't an act, but what happened next suprised
me.
Catherine wiped the tears off my face before taking my hands in hers,
"Sweetie, we will get through this together, I promise, and we still have
Lindsay," she said kissing me lightly on the lips before taking her seat
again.
I watched as he wrote something in his file before looking up again smiling,
"I think I can help you, and I hope to have some answers shortly," he
said standing offering his hand as we both shook it. Catherine put her arm
around my waist as he showed us out. Neither of us said anything on the way to
the car, but I knew that was going to change once we were driving.
Catherine helped me into the car before opening her phone. I can only assume
she is having her mom keep Lindsay longer, so we can have some alone time to
talk. The only problem being that if I tell Catherine where that speech came
from, I will be opening myself totally to her, and at this moment right now, I
don't think I can do it because it could lead to me telling her how I feel, and
I don't need that to ruin the relationship I have finally built with her
because that just might break me completely.
The drive home was mostly quiet except for the stop off for some coffee. Since
she knew my favorite, Catherine ordered for me leaving me to wallow more in my
silence trying to figure out if I can trust her with my last secrets. I knew
she wasn't mad at me as we drove either since I knew her mannerisms from being
on the receiving end of her anger so many times in the past. She pulled into
'our' driveway and got out as I held up my hand to let her know that I would be
right in. I watched as she walked into the house as I took a couple deep
breaths before climbing out and following Catherine inside.
Catherine was sitting on the couch as I came inside. I hurried over sitting on
the coffee table in front of her holding up my hand to stop her from saying
anything until I was done, "Catherine, what I am about to tell is only
known to one other person. The reason my speech sounded so real was because it
was. When I was Frisco, Stacy and I tried everything to have a baby together, and
the subsequent failures caused our relationship to end, leading to my coming
here," closing my eyes as I felt a couple tears escape as I waited for
Catherine's response.
CHAPTER 4
The first thing I felt were Catherine'e thumbs wiping away my tears. I re-opened my
eyes to find hers filled with tears, "I'm sorry Sara. When you came here,
I was a complete bitch to you. I didn't even consider why you were here. I just
went into bitch mode protecting my friend. And even after you stuck around, I
stayed that way not giving you any breaks or taking the time to get to know
you. I am so sorry," Catherine said burying her face in her hands as she
started to cry harder.
I pulled her into my lap before wrapping my arms around her, "Catherine, I
am equally to blame for our early relationship. I'm not known for opening up to
anyone, even to close friends. It's my defense mechanism. If I don't let anyone
in, I can't get hurt, but I realized after the Marks case that I was pretty
much alone and decided to change that, and I can honesty say that now I have a
nice circle of friends, and I'm so glad one of them is you," as I just sat
there rocking Catherine.
I didn't know how long I held her, but when I heard a small snore coming from
her, I realized that Catherine had fallen asleep, so I slid my arm under her
knees and took her to my room since it was closer. I was just going to lay her
down on the bed, but she wasn't letting me go. I ended up laying
down beside her placing her head on my shoulder as I continued to stroke her
back with my hand. I told myself that I was doing what any friend would do, but
my heart was leaping at what this could mean for Catherine and I.
I woke up with this feeling that I was being watched, and when I opened up my
eyes, I found Catherine staring at me smiling, "Sara Sidle, you are just
full of surprises. What started as me taking care of you ended up you taking
care of me. I think after this is over you and I need
to sit down and see what to do about of our relationship. I would push it now,
but with the lawyer saying he could help us sooner rather than later, I think
we should keep us at status quo right now."
I brought my thumb up and traced her lips before lifting up and lightly kissing
her, "Okay," was all I said as she touched her lips, but before she
could respond, there was a knock on my bedroom door.
"Mom, Sara, are you in here?" Lindsay said
through the door as I had Catherine lay her head back on my shoulder.
"Come on in sweetie," saying as she popped open the door as I put my
finger to my lips to keep her quiet, so she didn't 'wake' her mom.
Linds just smiled before backing out of the room. I
gave her a wink as the door closed before letting out the breath that I had
been holding, and I thought I was out of the woods until Catherine lifted up
with a confused look on her face, "Sara, why did we convince my daughter
that I was asleep? I mean she knows that we are friends, so it wouldn't be that
big of a deal if she found us sleeping in the same bed, right?" Catherine
asked as I closed my eyes. Shit, shit, shit, "Sara?"
There went all the good feelings that I had built up today. Sure, I kissed her,
but I'm sure she thinks that was just something friendly, "Catherine, what
I am about to tell you might cause you to hate me, but I'm tired of
hiding," opening my eyes, so I could look directly at Catherine when I say
this, "I don't know when it happened, but I have deep feelings for you and
would love to go out with you, but I will understand if you have only feelings
friendship towards me," which is a big fat lie, but I needed to say it
anyway.
She didn't run away which made me feel better, but she hadn't said anything
either, which was a little disconcerning. I sat up
ready to leave, but Catherine put her hand on my shoulder, "Sara
wait," she said as I ran my hands down my face, "Sara, to tell that I
share your feelings would be a lie, but to say I don't have more than friendly
feelings for you would be one too, and they piqued today both at the lawyer's
office and earlier when you told me about you and Stacy, and I would love to go
out to dinner with you," as I smiled brightly at what Catherine just said.
She kissed my cheek before climbing off the bed and out the door as I collapsed
back onto feeling better than I have in years because Catherine Willows just
told me that she has more than friendly feelings towards me and would love to
go out sometime, with me. But to keep my mind on the 'real' prize, I grabbed my
plans for upcoming lectures. Catherine is just the cherry on top. The job and
assignment were more important, so I needed to put that on front burner right
now and worry and fret over Catherine later, yeah right.
A couple hours later, I had the next two weeks lessons prepared, and I felt
relaxed. That was until there was a knock on my door, "Come in," I
said putting my things in order as Lindsay came into the room wearing a huge
smile, "What are you smiling about, you big dork," as Lindsay pounced
on me attempting to tickle me while I fought her off. I flipped us over and
pinned her arms above her head, "Don't mess with master," as I
started tickling her while she wriggled around trying to get loose.
"Sara, Linds was supposed to tell you dinner was
ready, and Lindsay, remind me to tell Greg to tell you not try and tickle Sara.
You will lose. Come on goofballs," Catherine said smiling as I let Lindsay
up as she gave me a hug before heading out before I got up and headed off to
the kitchen following Catherine.
To be continued…